Building Intimacy in Marriage: Lesson 6

You may like to read related literature on family management and management of married life on the following URLs:

(Family Management) http://family-harmony.blogspot.com/

(Marriage Counseling) http://marriage-counsel.blogspot.com/

(Mission statement for Families) http://marriage-counsel.blogspot.com/2011/03/mission-statement-for-families.html

(Life Management and Life Skills: Life Time Model) http://family-harmony.blogspot.com/2011/07/life-time-model-and-life-skills-life.html

(Do You Have the Right Kind of Skill Sets and Competencies to Run Your Marriage and Family Effectively?) http://family-harmony.blogspot.com/2011/03/do-you-have-right-kind-of-skill-sets.html

(Refer our High Quality Management Encyclopedia
“Management Universe” at: http://management-universe.blogspot.com/)

Need for Tutorials in Building Intimacy in Your Marriage

(All the six lessons of tutorial on "building intimacy in your marriage/relationship are now available in a book form titled "The Romance of Intimacy". The book is already benefitting a good number of married couples and couples in relationships. You can obtain the book as eBook from the Nuubuu link http://nbuu.co/bi and as printed book from Amazon)

The fact of life is that you live with your parents and brothers and sisters for just about 15 to 20 years of your entire life. You live with your own children only for 15 to 20 years of your life. And you live with your spouse for around 60 years of your life if you got married at the age of 30 and you are going to live till your age of 90 years.

So isn’t it very obvious that you should invest more of your time and efforts in building up your married life? Don’t you think you need to do whatever it needs to keep up the relationship with your spouse and spruce it up further to new heights?

Over a period of time many of us get into a rut and forget what it needs to maintain and build up the relationship. So, here are some reminder lessons for you.

Here onwards each post on “Family Management” section of the blog will narrate one important lesson. Implement this lesson and practice it again and again till it becomes your habit and happens to you naturally.

The first tutorial “Give Positive Strokes to Your Spouse” was published at the URL: http://shyam.bhatawdekar.net/index.php/2011/10/06/family-management-building-intimacy-in-marriage-lesson-1/

The second tutorial “Demonstrate Your Love, Affection and Care towards Your Spouse” was published at the URL: http://shyam.bhatawdekar.net/index.php/2011/11/02/life-management-family-management-building-intimacy-in-marriage-lesson-2/

The third tutorial “Demonstrate Your Respect to Each Other” was published at the URL: http://shyam.bhatawdekar.net/index.php/2011/12/03/life-management-family-management-building-intimacy-in-marriage-lesson-3/

The fourth tutorial “Communicate a Lot” was published at the URL: http://shyam.bhatawdekar.net/index.php/2011/12/09/1691/

The fifth tutorial “Build Physical Intimacy” was published at the URL: http://shyam.bhatawdekar.net/index.php/2011/12/16/life-management-family-management-building-intimacy-in-marriage-lesson-5/

Here is your sixth tutorial. Do your homework now.

Lesson 6: Keep the Romance Alive

Practicing and making a habit of the first five lessons as summarized below facilitate carrying out the lesson 6 (the one described in this post) i.e. keep the romance alive.
Summarized below are the first five lessons of building intimacy in marriage:

• Praising and admiring your life partner every now and then for some reason or without any reason (Refer: lesson/tutorial 1 Give Positive Strokes to Your Spouse).
• Showering your love, affection and care on your spouse (Refer: lesson/tutorial 2 Demonstrate Your Love, Affection and Care towards Your Spouse).
• Respecting your spouse irrespective of any situation (Refer: lesson/tutorial 3 Demonstrate Your Respect to Each Other).
• Communicating a lot with your life partner (Refer: lesson/tutorial 4 Communicate a Lot).
• Building physical intimacy between the two (Refer: lesson/tutorial 5 Building Physical Intimacy)

Implementing the above-mentioned five habits are the essential building blocks to achieve a desired level of emotional, physical and intellectual intimacy between husband and wife.

Having achieved a satisfactory level does not mean that you have to stop there. If you stop there, the already achieved level will have a tendency to drop down gradually. So you need not only to hold it there but continually inject the necessary pep.

So you next tutorial is about doing things that will not only create, build and maintain the romance of your intimate relationship that you have achieved now but to keep the romance alive throughout your married life.

What is this romance? So visualize the word “romance” and it will unleash some very interesting pictures. The pictures will be all about love affair, emotional/sentimental attachment, strangely beautiful feeling, artistic piece of work, fascination, enthusiasm, mystery, excitement, extravagance.

Therefore when we say “keep the romance alive in your marriage”, it means that you must always be on look out for making your marriage a piece of art, a love affair and journey full of fascination, enthusiasm, mystery, excitement and extravagance. Do not allow the typical boredom or dullness that seeps in effortlessly into many relationships.

You need to be creative, enthusiastic and active to achieve and liven up the romance of marriage. There are no set formulae for this. Each pair of husband and wife will have to think and implement what they think will be good for them- what will keep pepping up their married life, what will make it endlessly romantic.

As a general suggestion you can look at the following list (you need to do all of these things together):

• Romance of fulfilling the physical intimacy
• Romance of fulfilling the emotional intimacy
• Romance of bringing up your child/children
• Romance of educating your child/children
• Romance of enjoyable intellectual intercourse
• Romance of growing together
• Romance of strengthening the financial status
• Romance of building an adorable home
• Romance of unforgettable holidaying
• Romance of traveling the country/world
• Romance of exotic dining
• Romance of fun filled partying
• Romance of interesting entertainment
• Romance of pursuing the hobbies and interests
• Romance of broadening the horizons by reading and sharing
• Romance of lazy shopping
• Romance of youthful romancing
• Romance of exchanging pleasant surprises
• Romance of enjoyable socializing
• Romance of becoming good human beings
• Romance of doing silly things

List does not end here. You may like to add, delete, modify and workout your own romantic list.

Important thing is not just make the lists but to act on them.

It requires both (husband and wife) to build up strong and intimate relationship in marriage; it cannot be a one sided affair to be done only by wife or only by husband. Therefore, both husband and wife should read this tutorial together and start practicing it simultaneously. Of course, it does not mean that if wife has yet not started husband should wait and not start it too or vice-versa.

For More Guidance, Assistance, Training and Consultation

Contact: prodcons@prodcons.com

Training in all the soft skills and various management functions/techniques is imparted by Prodcons Group’s Mr Shyam Bhatawdekar and/or Dr (Mrs) Kalpana Bhatawdekar, eminent management educationists, management consultants and trainers- par excellence, with distinction of having trained over 150,000 people from around 250 organizations.

Also refer: (Prodcons Group) http://prodcons-group.blogspot.com/, (Training Programs by Prodcons Group) http://training-development-function.blogspot.com/, (Productivity Consultants) http://productivity-consultants.blogspot.com/

Other Topics of Interest: Counseling: General and Psychological

^{(Anger Management) http://controlling-anger.blogspot.com/
(Children’s Behavior Problems) http://child-behavior-problems.blogspot.com/
(Cholesterol Control) http://controlling-cholesterol.blogspot.com/
(Counseling: Psychological) http://counselingfamily.blogspot.com/
(Counseling: Psychological) http://counseling-family.blogspot.com/
(Cross Cultural Etiquette) http://cross-cultural-etiquette.blogspot.com/
(Do This Today) http://do-this-today.blogspot.com/
(Emotions) http://emotion-feeling.blogspot.com/
(Executive Etiquette and Manners)http://executive-manners.blogspot.com/
(Exercises) http://exercises-plan.blogspot.com/
(Family Counseling) http://family-harmony.blogspot.com/
(Health: Homeopathy) http://homeopathy-medicines.blogspot.com/
(Life Management: Competencies) http://knol.google.com/k/shyam-bhatawdekar/competency-matrix/6txz9nck6g3/4#
(Life Management: Effectiveness Management: HSoftware) http://knol.google.com/k/shyam-bhatawdekar/management-in-life-profession-family/6txz9nck6g3/3#
(Life management: I Am Liberated)http://knol.google.com/k/shyam-bhatawdekar/i-am-liberated/6txz9nck6g3/6#view
(Marriage Counseling) http://marriage-counsel.blogspot.com/
(Ownership on Job) http://job-ownership.blogspot.com/
(Parental Responsibilities) http://parental-responsibilities.blogspot.com/
(Personality) http://human-personality.blogspot.com/
(Qualities of Spouse) http://spouse-qualities.blogspot.com/
(Quit Smoking) http://quit-smoking-plan.blogspot.com/
(Self Development) http://managing-self.blogspot.com/
(Self-confidence) http://self-confidence-improvement.blogspot.com/
(Spiritual Quotient/Intelligence)http://spiritual-quotient.blogspot.com/
(Stress Management) http://managing-stress-strain.blogspot.com/
(Stress Management) http://management-of-stress.blogspot.com/
(Success in Life or Success) http://success-achievement.blogspot.com/
(Success in Life or Success) http://knol.google.com/k/shyam-bhatawdekar/success-in-life/6txz9nck6g3/14#view
(Swine Flu and Its Prevention) http://swine-flu-precaution.blogspot.com/
(Telephone Etiquette) http://telephone-etiquette.blogspot.com/
(Walking) http://walking-plan.blogspot.com/
(Winners and Losers) http://winners-losers.blogspot.com/}

Building Intimacy in Marriage: Lesson 5

 

You may like to read related literature on family management and management of married life on the following URLs:

(Family Management) http://family-harmony.blogspot.com/

(Marriage Counseling) http://marriage-counsel.blogspot.com/

(Mission statement for Families) http://marriage-counsel.blogspot.com/2011/03/mission-statement-for-families.html

(Life Management and Life Skills: Life Time Model) http://family-harmony.blogspot.com/2011/07/life-time-model-and-life-skills-life.html

(Do You Have the Right Kind of Skill Sets and Competencies to Run Your Marriage and Family Effectively?) http://family-harmony.blogspot.com/2011/03/do-you-have-right-kind-of-skill-sets.html

(Refer our High Quality Management Encyclopedia “Management Universe” at: http://management-universe.blogspot.com/)

Need for Tutorials in Building Intimacy in Your Marriage

(All the six lessons of tutorial on "building intimacy in your marriage/relationship are now available in a book form titled "The Romance of Intimacy". The book is already benefitting a good number of married couples and couples in relationships. You can obtain the book as eBook from the Nuubuu link http://nbuu.co/bi and as printed book from Amazon)

The fact of life is that you live with your parents and brothers and sisters for just about 15 to 20 years of your entire life. You live with your own children only for 15 to 20 years of your life. And you live with your spouse for around 60 years of your life if you got married at the age of 30 and you are going to live till your age of 90 years.

So isn’t it very obvious that you should invest more of your time and efforts in building up your married life? Don’t you think you need to do whatever it needs to keep up the relationship with your spouse and spruce it up further to new heights?

Over a period of time many of us get into a rut and forget what it needs to maintain and build up the relationship. So, here are some reminder lessons for you.

Here onwards each post on “Family Management” section of the blog will narrate one important lesson. Implement this lesson and practice it again and again till it becomes your habit and happens to you naturally.

The first tutorial “Give Positive Strokes to Your Spouse” was published at the URL: http://shyam.bhatawdekar.net/index.php/2011/10/06/family-management-building-intimacy-in-marriage-lesson-1/

The second tutorial “Demonstrate Your Love, Affection and Care towards Your Spouse” was published at the URL: http://shyam.bhatawdekar.net/index.php/2011/11/02/life-management-family-management-building-intimacy-in-marriage-lesson-2/

The third tutorial “Demonstrate Your Respect to Each Other” was published at the URL: http://shyam.bhatawdekar.net/index.php/2011/12/03/life-management-family-management-building-intimacy-in-marriage-lesson-3/

The fourth tutorial “Communicate a Lot” was published at the URL: http://shyam.bhatawdekar.net/index.php/2011/12/09/1691/

Here is your fifth tutorial. Do your homework now.

Lesson 5: Build Physical Intimacy

Practicing and making a habit of the first four lessons as summarized below facilitate carrying out the lesson 5 (the one described in this post) i.e. building physical intimacy.

Summarized below are the first four lessons of building intimacy in marriage:

• Praising and admiring your life partner every now and then for some reason or without any reason (Refer: lesson/tutorial 1 Give Positive Strokes to Your Spouse).
• Showering your love, affection and care on your spouse (Refer: lesson/tutorial 2 Demonstrate Your Love, Affection and Care towards Your Spouse).
• Respecting your spouse irrespective of any situation (Refer: lesson/tutorial 3 Demonstrate Your Respect to Each Other).
• Communicating a lot with your life partner (Refer: lesson/tutorial 4 Communicate a Lot).

Implementing the above-mentioned four habits will easily pave way for an enhanced, creative and blissful sexual relationship between husband and wife. Physical attraction and intimacy come naturally as a result of emotional intimacy and intellectual intimacy which you would achieve by practicing the first four lessons.

Sex is the vital part of married life and its active inclusion makes the married life complete, blissful and fun-filled. In no other legal or blood relationship sex plays any part. You get this privilege only as a married couple and you must use it fully for total happiness.

Apart from creating a fantastic bond between husband and wife, active sex (a good number of times in a week/month) has many advantages. Some of them are:

• You remain cheerful, calm and relaxed. This relieves the stresses. Thus it can fight depression.
• Intercourse makes one pleasantly tired and oxytocin that surges within your body works as a sedative. And then, you get good sound sleep.
• It burns calories. It provides a light exercise and can burn around 150 calories every half hour.
• It can protect your heart as it works like an aerobic exercise.
• It slows the ageing process due to secretion of hormones DHEA and oestrogen.
• Oxytocin (mentioned earlier) also acts as a natural painkiller.
• It can boost your immune system by production of antibody called immunoglobulin A.
• It enhances your overall self image and confidence.

Resort to frequent, scheduled and un-scheduled hugs and kisses and squeeze of hand. Make conscious efforts to hold hands even when you go out to movies or restaurants or any other events or walk together. It fills your environment with romance and excitement, a pre-requite for great sex life.

To derive enhanced pleasures out of physical intimacy, both husband and wife should talk about their preferences for the settings for love making and choose them accordingly: the dresses, the ambience of the place, new venues within home and away from home, a holiday, pre and post activities like a romantic dinner or movie or listening music or shopping or good combination of all of them etc.

They should enrich their knowledge of love making by reading together the related authentic literature. Since making love is a verb and therefore, a skill, it will need a good degree of practice to get a good handle on it. You will soon learn to like to communicate elaborately on how you wish to make love. It will be worthwhile using your creativity over a period of time for better results.

It requires both (husband and wife) to build up strong and intimate relationship in marriage; it cannot be a one sided affair to be done only by wife or only by husband. Therefore, both husband and wife should read this tutorial together and start practicing it simultaneously. Of course, it does not mean that if wife has yet not started husband should wait and not start it too or vice-versa. However, in this particular lesson (i.e. building physical intimacy), the husband should take the initiative and lead and the wife should fully support. Of course there is no harm if wife takes the lead and husband takes it in his stride as a mature and understanding person .

For More Guidance, Assistance, Training and Consultation

Contact: prodcons@prodcons.com

Training in all the soft skills and various management functions/techniques is imparted by Prodcons Group’s Mr Shyam Bhatawdekar and/or Dr (Mrs) Kalpana Bhatawdekar, eminent management educationists, management consultants and trainers- par excellence, with distinction of having trained over 150,000 people from around 250 organizations.

Also refer: (Prodcons Group) http://prodcons-group.blogspot.com/, (Training Programs by Prodcons Group) http://training-development-function.blogspot.com/, (Productivity Consultants) http://productivity-consultants.blogspot.com/

Other Topics of Interest: Counseling: General and Psychological

^{(Anger Management) http://controlling-anger.blogspot.com/
(Children’s Behavior Problems) http://child-behavior-problems.blogspot.com/
(Cholesterol Control) http://controlling-cholesterol.blogspot.com/
(Counseling: Psychological) http://counselingfamily.blogspot.com/
(Counseling: Psychological) http://counseling-family.blogspot.com/
(Cross Cultural Etiquette) http://cross-cultural-etiquette.blogspot.com/
(Do This Today) http://do-this-today.blogspot.com/
(Emotions) http://emotion-feeling.blogspot.com/
(Executive Etiquette and Manners)http://executive-manners.blogspot.com/
(Exercises) http://exercises-plan.blogspot.com/
(Family Counseling) http://family-harmony.blogspot.com/
(Health: Homeopathy) http://homeopathy-medicines.blogspot.com/
(Life Management: Competencies) http://knol.google.com/k/shyam-bhatawdekar/competency-matrix/6txz9nck6g3/4#
(Life Management: Effectiveness Management: HSoftware) http://knol.google.com/k/shyam-bhatawdekar/management-in-life-profession-family/6txz9nck6g3/3#
(Life management: I Am Liberated)http://knol.google.com/k/shyam-bhatawdekar/i-am-liberated/6txz9nck6g3/6#view
(Marriage Counseling) http://marriage-counsel.blogspot.com/
(Ownership on Job) http://job-ownership.blogspot.com/
(Parental Responsibilities) http://parental-responsibilities.blogspot.com/
(Personality) http://human-personality.blogspot.com/
(Qualities of Spouse) http://spouse-qualities.blogspot.com/
(Quit Smoking) http://quit-smoking-plan.blogspot.com/
(Self Development) http://managing-self.blogspot.com/
(Self-confidence) http://self-confidence-improvement.blogspot.com/
(Spiritual Quotient/Intelligence)http://spiritual-quotient.blogspot.com/
(Stress Management) http://managing-stress-strain.blogspot.com/
(Stress Management) http://management-of-stress.blogspot.com/
(Success in Life or Success) http://success-achievement.blogspot.com/
(Success in Life or Success) http://knol.google.com/k/shyam-bhatawdekar/success-in-life/6txz9nck6g3/14#view
(Swine Flu and Its Prevention) http://swine-flu-precaution.blogspot.com/
(Telephone Etiquette) http://telephone-etiquette.blogspot.com/
(Walking) http://walking-plan.blogspot.com/
(Winners and Losers) http://winners-losers.blogspot.com/}

Building Intimacy in Marriage: Lesson 4

You may like to read related literature on family management and management of married life on the following URLs: 

(Family Management) http://family-harmony.blogspot.com/ 

(Marriage Counseling) http://marriage-counsel.blogspot.com/

(Mission statement for Families) http://marriage-counsel.blogspot.com/2011/03/mission-statement-for-families.html

(Life Management and Life Skills: Life Time Model) http://family-harmony.blogspot.com/2011/07/life-time-model-and-life-skills-life.html

(Do You Have the Right Kind of Skill Sets and Competencies to Run Your Marriage and Family Effectively?) http://family-harmony.blogspot.com/2011/03/do-you-have-right-kind-of-skill-sets.html

(Refer our High Quality Management Encyclopedia “Management Universe” at: http://management-universe.blogspot.com/)

Need for Tutorials in Building Intimacy in Your Marriage

(All the six lessons of tutorial on "building intimacy in your marriage/relationship are now available in a book form titled "The Romance of Intimacy". The book is already benefitting a good number of married couples and couples in relationships. You can obtain the book as eBook from the Nuubuu link http://nbuu.co/bi and as printed book from Amazon)

The fact of life is that you live with your parents and brothers and sisters for just about 15 to 20 years of your entire life. You live with your own children only for 15 to 20 years of your life. And you live with your spouse for around 60 years of your life if you got married at the age of 30 and you are going to live till your age of 90 years.

So isn’t it very obvious that you should invest more of your time and efforts in building up your married life? Don’t you think you need to do whatever it needs to keep up the relationship with your spouse and spruce it up further to new heights?

Over a period of time many of us get into a rut and forget what it needs to maintain and build up the relationship. So, here are some reminder lessons for you.

Here onwards each post on “Family Management” section of the blog will narrate one important lesson. Implement this lesson and practice it again and again till it becomes your habit and happens to you naturally.

The first tutorial “Give Positive Strokes to Your Spouse” was published at the URL: http://shyam.bhatawdekar.net/index.php/2011/10/06/family-management-building-intimacy-in-marriage-lesson-1/

The second tutorial “Demonstrate Your Love, Affection and Care towards Your Spouse” was published at the URL: http://shyam.bhatawdekar.net/index.php/2011/11/02/life-management-family-management-building-intimacy-in-marriage-lesson-2/

The third tutorial “Demonstrate Your Respect to Each Other” was published at the URL: http://shyam.bhatawdekar.net/index.php/2011/12/03/life-management-family-management-building-intimacy-in-marriage-lesson-3/

Here is your fourth tutorial. Do your homework now.

Lesson 4: Communicate a Lot

Implementing the following will easily pave way for duty-related, intellectual, emotional and fun-filled communication between husband and wife:

• Praising and admiring your life partner every now and then for some reason or without any reason (Refer: lesson/tutorial 1 Give Positive Strokes to Your Spouse).
• Showering your love, affection and care on your spouse (Refer: lesson/tutorial 2 Demonstrate Your Love, Affection and Care towards Your Spouse).
• Respecting your spouse irrespective of any situation (Refer lesson/tutorial 3 Demonstrate Your Respect to Each Other).

Start off with communication patterns both of you are mutually comfortable with. You may like to share the interesting day-to-day general news, office news, gossips, incidents and happenings. You may share with each other the plans for the evenings and the weekends. You may run through together your shopping lists for home, your child/children, your spouse and yourself. You may chalk out together the details of forthcoming parties, picnics and outings. You will like to tell regular and innocent jokes and amuse each other; soon to be able to exchange naughtier jokes. And all of this involves good degree of communication and so, do all of this.

Soon you may like to start talking on books, movies, plays and sport. You can start exchanging things related to each others’ hobbies and interests. You may like to see together the same TV shows and movies all cuddled up and making silly comments on them. Holding each others’ hands and touching will enhance and enrich your communication intimacies.

Good communication isn't just about verbal exchange. Frequent, scheduled and un-scheduled hugs and kisses and squeeze of hand can communicate lot more than what you can communicate by speaking. If you find you rarely touch your partner, it's worth getting into this habit soon. Make a conscious effort to hold hands when you go out to movies or restaurants or any other events or walk together. If deeper physical intimacies have been off the agenda for some time, these new habits can help reopen them. You will soon learn to like to communicate elaborately on how you wish to make love. Then, an interesting, intimate and fulfilling part of your conversation can take place in the bed lying together under the sheets.

You will soon be quite comfortable communicating and discussing many other aspects. You will need to discuss your home finances and budgets, child’s/children’s education, self growth (personal and professional) and such important issues. You may like to discuss some quite vital family matters like how two of you wish to run your family over the next five to ten years (your family’s mission statement and objectives; refer http://shyam.bhatawdekar.net/index.php/2011/07/14/life-management-and-life-skills-family-mission-statement/).

You may also like to move on to those areas of communication that may involve frank expression of your individual opinions, some serious thinking, dissentions, conflicts, clearing the air etc.

You may like to speak lovingly, sincerely and honestly to sort out your anger or resentment towards your spouse, if any, without raising your finger at him/her. (It you haven't been honest with each other for a long period of your married life, you may like to seek professional help and support of a counselor/confidant/confidante to sort out the things).

Once the husband and wife decide that they need to build up the intimacies in their married life (and this they should do without any exception very soon), they need to start to communicate and then graduate to communicate a lot. Really lots and lots. Soon they will learn open, decent, respectful, serious, fun-filled and sexy communication. Open, honest and sincere communication serves as an excellent lubricant that can run the marriage machine frictionless and smoothly giving hell of a lot of effectiveness and efficiency for a happy family.

It requires both (husband and wife) to build up strong and intimate relationship in marriage; it cannot be a one sided affair to be done only by wife or only by husband. Therefore, both husband and wife should read this tutorial together and start practicing it simultaneously. Of course, it does not mean that if wife has yet not started husband should wait and not start it too or vice-versa.

For More Guidance, Assistance, Training and Consultation

Contact: prodcons@prodcons.com

Training in all the soft skills and various management functions/techniques is imparted by Prodcons Group’s Mr Shyam Bhatawdekar and/or Dr (Mrs) Kalpana Bhatawdekar, eminent management educationists, management consultants and trainers- par excellence, with distinction of having trained over 150,000 people from around 250 organizations.

Also refer: (Prodcons Group) http://prodcons-group.blogspot.com/, (Training Programs by Prodcons Group) http://training-development-function.blogspot.com/, (Productivity Consultants) http://productivity-consultants.blogspot.com/

Other Topics of Interest: Counseling: General and Psychological

^{(Anger Management) http://controlling-anger.blogspot.com/
(Children’s Behavior Problems) http://child-behavior-problems.blogspot.com/
(Cholesterol Control) http://controlling-cholesterol.blogspot.com/
(Counseling: Psychological) http://counselingfamily.blogspot.com/
(Counseling: Psychological) http://counseling-family.blogspot.com/
(Cross Cultural Etiquette) http://cross-cultural-etiquette.blogspot.com/
(Do This Today) http://do-this-today.blogspot.com/
(Emotions) http://emotion-feeling.blogspot.com/
(Executive Etiquette and Manners)http://executive-manners.blogspot.com/
(Exercises) http://exercises-plan.blogspot.com/
(Family Counseling) http://family-harmony.blogspot.com/
(Health: Homeopathy) http://homeopathy-medicines.blogspot.com/
(Life Management: Competencies) http://knol.google.com/k/shyam-bhatawdekar/competency-matrix/6txz9nck6g3/4#
(Life Management: Effectiveness Management: HSoftware) http://knol.google.com/k/shyam-bhatawdekar/management-in-life-profession-family/6txz9nck6g3/3#
(Life management: I Am Liberated)http://knol.google.com/k/shyam-bhatawdekar/i-am-liberated/6txz9nck6g3/6#view
(Marriage Counseling) http://marriage-counsel.blogspot.com/
(Ownership on Job) http://job-ownership.blogspot.com/
(Parental Responsibilities) http://parental-responsibilities.blogspot.com/
(Personality) http://human-personality.blogspot.com/
(Qualities of Spouse) http://spouse-qualities.blogspot.com/
(Quit Smoking) http://quit-smoking-plan.blogspot.com/
(Self Development) http://managing-self.blogspot.com/
(Self-confidence) http://self-confidence-improvement.blogspot.com/
(Spiritual Quotient/Intelligence)http://spiritual-quotient.blogspot.com/
(Stress Management) http://managing-stress-strain.blogspot.com/
(Stress Management) http://management-of-stress.blogspot.com/
(Success in Life or Success) http://success-achievement.blogspot.com/
(Success in Life or Success) http://knol.google.com/k/shyam-bhatawdekar/success-in-life/6txz9nck6g3/14#view
(Swine Flu and Its Prevention) http://swine-flu-precaution.blogspot.com/
(Telephone Etiquette) http://telephone-etiquette.blogspot.com/
(Walking) http://walking-plan.blogspot.com/
(Winners and Losers) http://winners-losers.blogspot.com/}

Building Intimacy in Marriage: Lesson 3

You may like to read related literature on family management and management of married life on the following URLs:

(Family Management) http://family-harmony.blogspot.com/

(Marriage Counseling) http://marriage-counsel.blogspot.com/

(Mission statement for Families) http://marriage-counsel.blogspot.com/2011/03/mission-statement-for-families.html

(Life Management and Life Skills: Life Time Model) http://family-harmony.blogspot.com/2011/07/life-time-model-and-life-skills-life.html

(Do You Have the Right Kind of Skill Sets and Competencies to Run Your Marriage and Family Effectively?) http://family-harmony.blogspot.com/2011/03/do-you-have-right-kind-of-skill-sets.html

(Refer our High Quality Management Encyclopedia “Management Universe” at: http://management-universe.blogspot.com/)

Need for Tutorials in Building Intimacy in Your Marriage

(All the six lessons of tutorial on "building intimacy in your marriage/relationship are now available in a book form titled "The Romance of Intimacy". The book is already benefitting a good number of married couples and couples in relationships. You can obtain the book as eBook from the Nuubuu link http://nbuu.co/bi and as printed book from Amazon)

The fact of life is that you live with your parents and brothers and sisters for just about 15 to 20 years of your entire life. You live with your own children only for 15 to 20 years of your life. And you live with your spouse for around 60 years of your life if you got married at the age of 30 and you are going to live till your age of 90 years.

So isn’t it very obvious that you should invest more of your time and efforts in building up your married life? Don’t you think you need to do whatever it needs to keep up the relationship with your spouse and spruce it up further to new heights?

Over a period of time many of us get into a rut and forget what it needs to maintain and build up the relationship. So, here are some reminder lessons for you.

Here onwards each post on “Family Management” section of the blog will narrate one important lesson. Implement this lesson and practice it again and again till it becomes your habit and happens to you naturally.

The first tutorial “Give Positive Strokes to Your Spouse” was published at the URL: http://shyam.bhatawdekar.net/index.php/2011/10/06/family-management-building-intimacy-in-marriage-lesson-1/

The second tutorial “Demonstrate Your Love, Affection and Care towards Your Spouse” was published at the URL: http://shyam.bhatawdekar.net/index.php/2011/11/02/life-management-family-management-building-intimacy-in-marriage-lesson-2/

Here is your third tutorial. Do your homework now.

Lesson 3: Demonstrate Your Respect to Each Other

The natural danger in any intimate relationship like between husband and wife is taking each other for granted within a few months or few years of marriage. The reason is the obvious familiarity that arises out of staying together twenty four hours of every day.

Prior to marriage or during dating/courtship or during the initial days of marriage the husband and wife use lots of etiquette and manners. They show their best sides to each other. They address each other with dignity. They behave with great degree of civility and create an impression of respecting each other. They listen each other a lot, nod with mutual agreements on most of the topics, try avoiding conflicts and so on.

Unfortunately after living together as a married couple, they throw their caution to winds. The facades are dropped. They start showing their true colors. They start misbehaving, use bad language, become manner less and mutual civility as desired between two human beings is lost somewhere. The initial friendship turns into an ever increasing familiarity and in turn familiarity breeds contempt. They start falling apart.

They feel highly insulted by the disrespect hurled at each other. The delicate spots of human dignity feels hurt and the relationship starts suffering. It starts depleting in all the departments of intimacy- emotional intimacy, intellectual intimacy and as a resultant, the physical intimacy.

The couple who understands this phenomena does not allow such situation to occur. Such husband and wife team embraces mutual respect not only during the early days but throughout the entire married life. They demonstrate the same civility towards each other as is expected in any civilized society between two persons. The etiquette and manners are kept intact. Disagreement and dissonance are definitely expressed but they are expressed in a manner that does not hurt the partner. They do not shout at each other or blame each other. They do not use derogatory words/language. They do not address each other with contempt.  They use correct tone of voice while expressing their opinion. They do not use a condescending tone. Conflicts due to difference of opinions are far less (may be around 10%)  than due to wrong tone of voice (may be around 90%).

It is necessary to give your spouse the dignity a human being deserves. Stop taking each other for granted. Do not hover on each other all the time. Give each other the space and privacy one should have. Remember that a husband does not possess a wife or a wife does not possess a husband. They are equal partners in marriage. Each one of them is an individual and has his/her own place in married life as well as a loving association with each other.

You can not enjoy the real bliss of the married life involving emotional, intellectual and physical intimacy unless you respect your spouse (lesson 3), demonstrate your love, affection and care to your spouse (lesson 2) and praise/appreciate your spouse. So start doing it, start practicing it (do it again and again till you are perfect in doing it). Knowing does not mean anything unless you implement it. And please remember practice makes a man (and a woman) prefect.

It requires both (husband and wife) to build up strong and intimate relationship in marriage; it cannot be a one sided affair to be done only by wife or only by husband. Therefore, both husband and wife should read this tutorial together and start practicing it simultaneously. Of course, it does not mean that if wife has yet not started husband should wait and not start it too or vice-versa.

For More Guidance, Assistance, Training and Consultation

Contact: prodcons@prodcons.com

Training in all the soft skills and various management functions/techniques is imparted by Prodcons Group’s Mr Shyam Bhatawdekar and/or Dr (Mrs) Kalpana Bhatawdekar, eminent management educationists, management consultants and trainers- par excellence, with distinction of having trained over 150,000 people from around 250 organizations.

Also refer: (Prodcons Group) http://prodcons-group.blogspot.com/, (Training Programs by Prodcons Group) http://training-development-function.blogspot.com/, (Productivity Consultants) http://productivity-consultants.blogspot.com/
Other Topics of Interest: Counseling: General and Psychological

^{(Anger Management) http://controlling-anger.blogspot.com/
(Children’s Behavior Problems) http://child-behavior-problems.blogspot.com/
(Cholesterol Control) http://controlling-cholesterol.blogspot.com/
(Counseling: Psychological) http://counselingfamily.blogspot.com/
(Counseling: Psychological) http://counseling-family.blogspot.com/
(Cross Cultural Etiquette) http://cross-cultural-etiquette.blogspot.com/
(Do This Today) http://do-this-today.blogspot.com/
(Emotions) http://emotion-feeling.blogspot.com/
(Executive Etiquette and Manners)http://executive-manners.blogspot.com/
(Exercises) http://exercises-plan.blogspot.com/
(Family Counseling) http://family-harmony.blogspot.com/
(Health: Homeopathy) http://homeopathy-medicines.blogspot.com/
(Life Management: Competencies) http://knol.google.com/k/shyam-bhatawdekar/competency-matrix/6txz9nck6g3/4#
(Life Management: Effectiveness Management: HSoftware) http://knol.google.com/k/shyam-bhatawdekar/management-in-life-profession-family/6txz9nck6g3/3#
(Life management: I Am Liberated)http://knol.google.com/k/shyam-bhatawdekar/i-am-liberated/6txz9nck6g3/6#view
(Marriage Counseling) http://marriage-counsel.blogspot.com/
(Ownership on Job) http://job-ownership.blogspot.com/
(Parental Responsibilities) http://parental-responsibilities.blogspot.com/
(Personality) http://human-personality.blogspot.com/
(Qualities of Spouse) http://spouse-qualities.blogspot.com/
(Quit Smoking) http://quit-smoking-plan.blogspot.com/
(Self Development) http://managing-self.blogspot.com/
(Self-confidence) http://self-confidence-improvement.blogspot.com/
(Spiritual Quotient/Intelligence)http://spiritual-quotient.blogspot.com/
(Stress Management) http://managing-stress-strain.blogspot.com/
(Stress Management) http://management-of-stress.blogspot.com/
(Success in Life or Success) http://success-achievement.blogspot.com/
(Success in Life or Success) http://knol.google.com/k/shyam-bhatawdekar/success-in-life/6txz9nck6g3/14#view
(Swine Flu and Its Prevention) http://swine-flu-precaution.blogspot.com/
(Telephone Etiquette) http://telephone-etiquette.blogspot.com/
(Walking) http://walking-plan.blogspot.com/
(Winners and Losers) http://winners-losers.blogspot.com/}