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Wednesday, November 2, 2011

Building Intimacy in Marriage: Lesson 2


You may like to read related literature on family management and management of married life on the following URLs:

(Family Management) http://family-harmony.blogspot.com/
(Marriage Counseling) http://marriage-counsel.blogspot.com/
(Mission statement for Families) http://marriage-counsel.blogspot.com/2011/03/mission-statement-for-families.html
(Life Management and Life Skills: Life Time Model) http://family-harmony.blogspot.com/2011/07/life-time-model-and-life-skills-life.html
(Do You Have the Right Kind of Skill Sets and Competencies to Run Your Marriage and Family Effectively?) http://family-harmony.blogspot.com/2011/03/do-you-have-right-kind-of-skill-sets.html
Give Positive Strokes to Your Spouse: http://shyam.bhatawdekar.net/index.php/2011/10/06/family-management-building-intimacy-in-marriage-lesson-1/
(Refer our High Quality Management Encyclopedia “Management Universe at: http://management-universe.blogspot.com/)

Need for Tutorials in Building Intimacy in Your Marriage

(All the six lessons of tutorial on "building intimacy in your marriage/relationship are now available in a book form titled "The Romance of Intimacy". The book is already benefitting a good number of married couples and couples in relationships. You can obtain the book as eBook from the Nuubuu link http://nbuu.co/bi and as printed book from Amazon)

The fact of life is that you live with your parents and brothers and sisters for just about 15 to 20 years of your entire life. You live with your own children only for 15 to 20 years of your life. And you live with your spouse for around 60 years of your life if you got married at the age of 30 and you are going to live till your age of 90 years.

So isn’t it very obvious that you should invest more of your time and efforts in building up your married life? Don’t you think you need to do whatever it needs to keep up the relationship with your spouse and spruce it up further to new heights?

Over a period of time many of us get into a rut and forget what it needs to maintain and build up the relationship. So, here are some reminder lessons for you.

Here onwards each post on “Family Management” section of the blog will narrate one important lesson. Implement this lesson and practice it again and again till it becomes your habit and happens to you naturally.

The first tutorial Give Positive Strokes to Your Spousewas published at the URL: http://shyam.bhatawdekar.net/index.php/2011/10/06/family-management-building-intimacy-in-marriage-lesson-1/

Here is your second tutorial. Do your homework now.

Lesson 2: Demonstrate Your Love, Affection and Care towards Your Spouse

In putting this tutorial to practice, as the first step every married person should learn to give the following to his/her spouse in large bouts:
  1. Love
  2. Affection
  3. Care
To love, to give affection and to care- all the three are verbs and you must learn to do them effectively and efficiently as much as you have learnt to walk, speak, read, drive and so on. You learnt these things on your own and with some help from other sources. Learning does not take place automatically- it does not happen to you. You have to put in considerable effort learning anything.

Do the same to learn to give love and affection to your spouse and to take care of her/him.

The second step is to start doing i.e. start giving love and affection to your spouse and taking care of her/him. Learning is one thing, putting what you learnt to practice is another thing. Doing is always more important than only knowing. So start:
  1. Loving your spouse
  2. Giving affection to your spouse
  3. Taking care of your spouse
And do them demonstratively. Your spouse should start realizing that you love her/him, you are affectionate to her/him and you care for her/him. Therefore, what you do to her/him should be genuine and not fake or mere acting.

It will be a great idea to give hugs and kisses to your spouse out of routine or out of turn and surprise your spouse. Do express your love every now and then by saying passionately, “I love you lots.” Do use the endearments to each other in your conversations. And converse a lot with each other like great dates or friends do. Touch each other lots.

While you can kiss on lips to demonstrate your love, do express your affection and care by kissing your spouse’s cheeks or temple and assuring her/him by your embrace or touch to communicate, “I am always around. Never worry any more.” Your partner needs you more when she/he is sick or down financially or emotionally or there is sudden overload of professional and/or household workload etc.

Care and affection are well demonstrated when you support and help your spouse in his/her professional and household situations. Husband and wife can share the household chores like cooking, washing, grocery, looking after the kids etc. Let it not fall on only wife’s shoulder or only on husband’s shoulder. Also, when the wife has to do longer or odd hours of work at her office, the husband can take on the activities that wife normally performs at home and vice-versa.

Important thing is that your love, affection and care should be constantly felt by your life partner.

It requires both (husband and wife) to build up strong and intimate relationship in marriage; it cannot be a one sided affair to be done only by wife or only by husband. Therefore, both husband and wife should read this tutorial together and start practicing it simultaneously. Of course, it does not mean that if wife has yet not started husband should wait and not start it too or vice-versa.

For More Guidance, Assistance, Training and Consultation

Contact: prodcons@prodcons.com

Training in all the soft skills and various management functions/techniques is imparted by Prodcons Group’s Mr Shyam Bhatawdekar and/or Dr (Mrs) Kalpana Bhatawdekar, eminent management educationists, management consultants and trainers- par excellence, with distinction of having trained over 150,000 people from around 250 organizations.

Also refer: (Prodcons Group) http://prodcons-group.blogspot.com/, (Training Programs by Prodcons Group) http://training-development-function.blogspot.com/, (Productivity Consultants) http://productivity-consultants.blogspot.com/

Other Topics of Interest: Counseling: General and Psychological

(Anger Management) http://controlling-anger.blogspot.com/
(Children’s Behavior Problems) http://child-behavior-problems.blogspot.com/
(Cholesterol Control) http://controlling-cholesterol.blogspot.com/
(Counseling: Psychological) http://counselingfamily.blogspot.com/
(Counseling: Psychological) http://counseling-family.blogspot.com/
(Cross Cultural Etiquette) http://cross-cultural-etiquette.blogspot.com/
(Do This Today) http://do-this-today.blogspot.com/
(Emotions) http://emotion-feeling.blogspot.com/
(Executive Etiquette and Manners)http://executive-manners.blogspot.com/
(Exercises) http://exercises-plan.blogspot.com/
(Family Counseling) http://family-harmony.blogspot.com/
(Health: Homeopathy) http://homeopathy-medicines.blogspot.com/
(Life Management: Competencies) http://knol.google.com/k/shyam-bhatawdekar/competency-matrix/6txz9nck6g3/4#
(Life Management: Effectiveness Management: HSoftware) http://knol.google.com/k/shyam-bhatawdekar/management-in-life-profession-family/6txz9nck6g3/3#
(Life management: I Am Liberated)http://knol.google.com/k/shyam-bhatawdekar/i-am-liberated/6txz9nck6g3/6#view
(Marriage Counseling) http://marriage-counsel.blogspot.com/
(Ownership on Job) http://job-ownership.blogspot.com/
(Parental Responsibilities) http://parental-responsibilities.blogspot.com/
(Personality) http://human-personality.blogspot.com/
(Qualities of Spouse) http://spouse-qualities.blogspot.com/
(Quit Smoking) http://quit-smoking-plan.blogspot.com/
(Self Development) http://managing-self.blogspot.com/
(Self-confidence) http://self-confidence-improvement.blogspot.com/
(Spiritual Quotient/Intelligence)http://spiritual-quotient.blogspot.com/
(Stress Management) http://managing-stress-strain.blogspot.com/
(Stress Management) http://management-of-stress.blogspot.com/
(Success in Life or Success) http://success-achievement.blogspot.com/
(Success in Life or Success) http://knol.google.com/k/shyam-bhatawdekar/success-in-life/6txz9nck6g3/14#view
(Swine Flu and Its Prevention) http://swine-flu-precaution.blogspot.com/
(Telephone Etiquette) http://telephone-etiquette.blogspot.com/
(Walking) http://walking-plan.blogspot.com/
(Winners and Losers) http://winners-losers.blogspot.com/